Path of Humility

Second Week
Reasons for Being Humble


Preparation for the Second Week

The need of humility is sufficiently demonstrated to us when we see how persistently pride tempts us even when it is held in check. It is a life-long enemy.

The foundations of virtue are undermined by this vice, and become unstable; the principles of the spiritual life are threatened; our good deeds are deprived of their merit, and punishment and destruction follow.

We must, then, make ourselves humble. This need, well established though it is, does not, however, give us the clue to the raison d' etre of humility, though it assures us that such a raison d' etre exists.

All disorder, indeed, points to some evil, since God has put goodness, like health, in equilibrium.

Then humility should result from the very nature of things, and to be humble is merely to be true. It is this that will be shown in the following meditations.

1. The first four meditations set forth the condition of man considered as a created being, as a fallen being and as a being transformed by grace.

The result of these considerations should be a humility that all alike need, the most perfect as well as the most faulty- humility before God.

It would seem that such humility should be easy, since it is only in accordance with right feeling; it is, however, a very puissant humility, for it has made saints. Why has it made many saints? Is human weakness the reason? In great part, for we see the best and pursue the worst. But it is also due to a want of conviction.

Traditional truths do not arrest the attention, they are too familiar; and even when seriously examined, they do not strike us with any force, for abstract truth makes little impression on the generality of people.

The preceding meditations, on the contrary, should have impressed us, for they envisage our tendencies as moral facts- facts well nigh as tangible as material facts- and facts have the power to strike and convince us.

Though this cannot be said of the new truths which we are about to consider, we should take care not to fall into the mistake of regarding as uncertain what is less tangible, and looking upon revelations that surprise us as doubtful.

We are apt to resemble those ignorant people who shrug their shoulders when a scientific man shows them all that is contained, for instance, in a drop of water. They do not know that beneath the outward shows of things an unknown world lies hidden.

2. To these four abstract, and in some sort personal, meditations succeed a consideration of our faults. This entirely concerns ourselves and no one else. It is no longer metaphysical truth but our own work that is spread out before our eyes, the work of our whole life, including all our actions, all our thoughts, and all our guilty omissions, a vast field, some portions of which, belonging to the distant past, are shrouded in obscurity and shadowed by illusions, but which, under the light of a serious examination, will become clearly distinguishable.

This meditation must become the basis of our humility, our personal humility, a humility which abases us not only before God, but before men; a humility which extinguishes an exaggerated sense of self-esteem, and forbids us to seek an esteem from others which we know we do not deserve.

3. To esteem an object is to recognize its worth, and its worth can only be measured by some comparison. In this case it is the comparison with others. With whom shall I compare myself? With the low and miserable? No, for they do not merit esteem. Then I must compare myself with the great and good, and I see that God and the Saints are the only true measure of the greatness and goodness that deserve esteem. This meditation is designed to complete the effect of abstract reasoning by force of a sensible impression.

4. Because we find in certain motives for humility a reason to abase ourselves only before God, are we to conclude that such motives can have no influence on our intercourse with men, because they do not prompt us to a practical humility?

Not at all. Humility, though it has indeed two objects, God and our neighbor, is in essence one and the same, an inclination to self-abasement.

These meditations, developing in the first place our humility towards God, will enable us to overcome our disposition to overrate ourselves, and will lead us to a wise measure of humility towards our neighbor.

As all intellectual culture increases our power to assimilate knowledge, and all true affection disposes us the better to love God, so it is with the acquisition of humility, whatever may be its object.

Endeavour to absorb these truths, which, however, will cause you to lower your head and will make you feel that you dare not again rashly suppose yourself superior to anyone.



First Meditation

Exercise VIII
The Nothingness of the Creature


First Point: The nothingness of being: I am nothing.
Second Point: The nothingness of action: I can do nothing.

Evening Preparation.- If we derived our being from some matter that exists outside God, or if, being created by Him, we could appropriate as our own even the smallest fraction of our substance, we should have a value- and a value, though minute, that would be appreciable.

But this is not the case; for though we come from God, we do not pass out His fruitful bosom except by His creative act and almighty will. We are not beings, properly speaking, but something as unsubstantial and as fugitive as notes of music coming forth from a instrument under the fingers of a musician. God is neither enriched by the fact that He becomes a Creator, nor diminished by the fact that we exist.

This is a definite truth, demonstrated by reason, and admitted by the most rigorous philosophy.

And yet, in spite of all this, I am, I have, a kind of being; this being has an extension and a form; it acts, it displaces matter, and it transforms it; it wills or it does not will; it is free; it is conscious, by its intelligence, of the universe; and by its genius it can produce marvels. Is then, all this nothing? A being and its actions must be something.

Let us clearly understand at once that this something, in the sight of God, is so vain and so ephemeral that the Scriptures call it "a quasi nothing": tanquam nihilium ante te- in short, a being that does not count!

Thus are explained the words of S. Paul: Quis te discernit? Quid habes quod non accepisti? "What hast thou that thou hast not received?"

This profound point of view is disconcerting and startling enough to confuse us, but it is an inevitable conclusion that imposes itself upon the whole soul and determines the whole will; for humility is not only a conviction, it is an active virtue. It is not enough to philosophize on all these questions; the chief thing is to practice them.


Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace to conceive such a lively sense of my own nothingness that it may penetrate and direct me.

1. The nothingness of being: I am nothing.- Our Lord said to S. Catherine of Siena: " Does thou know, My daughter, Who I am and who thou art? Thou art happy if thou knowest it; I am He Who is; thou art she who are not."

God is Being in the fullest meaning of the word, it is the name He gives to Himself: Ego sum, qui sum. " I am nothingness in all its emptiness, and this is my name": Substantia mea tanquam nihilium- " My substance is a kind of nothing."

Before my creation I did not exist, even in the most elemental sense. A thousand years ago, a hundred years ago, I was a possibility- that a mere nothing might have prevented from coming into existence.

One day I appeared on the earth. Centuries had preceded me; centuries doubtless, will succeed me. For the present I fill a few short fleeting hours. Then silence will close about me, as deep water engulfs the stone that for a moment has rippled its surface.

This being of mine is as fragile and inconsistent as a vapor which disappears as soon as it arises: Vapor est modicum parens. It is only vivified dust: Memento, homo quia pulvis es.

In the light of pure truth, the visible substance of my body and the invisible substance of my soul are alike nothingness, sustained in being only by creative power. Take away for a moment this unseen but necessary action, and my being would faint and vanish away like smoke in the air, like a cloud in the sky, without leaving any trace: Ad nihilium redactus sum et nescivi.

" O unknown nothing! O unknown nothing!" cried Blessed Angela of Foligno- cry of profound truth, the summary of our poor greatness, but also the origin of sentiments the most powerful, the most elevated, and the most worthy of God.

If I am nothingness, O Lord, Thou art Being! If I am naught, Thou art All.

This double vision, by its contrasts, forms the rhythm of the songs of heaven. In this celestial light the condition of the blessed appears as similar to my own; but their humility is my shame as well as my lesson. Their glory makes their nothingness ever more and more resplendent in their eyes, while my many miseries succeed in obscuring mine from me....

II. The nothingness of action: I can do nothing.- Our acts are of the same nature as our being. Our being subsists, and we do not see the creative power that sustains it. We act, and we see no more clearly the power that makes action possible. It seems to us that our actions are our very own.

I move my hand or my head, I contrive a thing, I solve a problem, I think, I choose, I love, and all that is positive in these actions is produced far more by the action of God than by mine. It cannot be otherwise. The nature of things demands it; and God, Who can do all things, is unable to give me the power to accomplish a single positive action without Himself; otherwise He would make me a creator. This is a mystery as overwhelming as it is true, a deduction that invades even the sanctuary of my free will.

Even in the resolution I have made to become humble and which seems so exclusively mine, because I might have chosen not to make it, God has acted a thousand times more than myself; and my participation is only to be found in my correspondence with the influence that solicited me.

And if I search into the origin of my correspondence, why I have given it and the strength which has enabled me to give it, once more I find God.

At length, in order to explain how with all this I still remain free, I am forced to say to myself: I feel that I am free, and I know that God is powerful enough to respect my essential liberty while maintaining it ti the utmost degree.

If I do evil, the action of God, obeying the general laws of supreme wisdom, lends its concurrence to all that is positive in what I do, and accompanies me still even to the moment when, divorcing myself from order, I escape from its influence.

Evil is a falling away for which I am responsible; I divert the action of God and hinder its fruition; I force it into strange channels, and finally it is lost.

O Lord, I do not understand myself! Then how vain and absurd is my self-complacence! How foolish my confidence in my own will even when it is strongest! How unjust I am when I attribute to myself any good that I may do! How dare I believe in myself, or prefer myself to another?

The simple veil of the created masks all this nothingness, but the veil is light and a thousand accidents displace it; yet it is sufficient to deceive me. It is, besides, very transparent; but I am careless, and do not discern what it hides. I continue to attribute an absolute reality to human action, and thus bolster up my pride.

Lord, Thou Who seest all things, what dost Thou think of this blind one? Have pity upon him, open his eyes, and make Thine Infinity shine upon his littleness, for he is ashamed of his past pride.

In the midst of success as well as in reverses this sight will give serenity; is it not, then, worth all our trouble? It is the highest wisdom that sets all things in their proper light and true proportion. The shadow of our nothingness throws into relief the greatness of the Being Who is All.

Resolution.- To contemplate frequently the Infinite that envelops me, to lose myself in It, and to leave there all my pride. To resolve to spend a few moments, morning and evening, on my knees, pondering these beautiful words: " My God and my all."


Second Meditation
Exercise IX
The Necessity of Actual Grace

First Point: Its necessity in general.
Second point: The necessity of disposing grace.
Third point: The necessity of concomitant grace.

Evening Preparation.- The preceding meditation casts a light upon the meditation of tomorrow.

If, in the order of nature, I am nothing, what am I, then in the order of grace? Grace is not a right, and when it is given it does not become a part of my substance; it remains a divine vesture which at any moment may be sripped from me.

Again, if the natural life needs for its least action the cooperation of God, how much greater is our dependence upon Him for the supernatural life whose actions partake of the divine!

Many Catholics, without suspecting it, hold almost heretical views on the subject of the operating of actual grace. Their error arises from ignorance, and their good faith excuses them, but it is their duty to inform themselves. Grace is not, as they believe, a complement of strength; it is the first principle of all supernatural action, even of those actions which long use or a personal predilection make extremely easy to us; this is a dogma of faith.

Seeing our nothingness and our position from this new point of view, we shall not fail to realize that here at least our dependence adds to our greatness; our supernatural life is essentially a dependent life because it is a participation in the divine life, and God alone is the author and sustainer of it. This condition is ours not only in the present, but will be ours throughout eternity, for God will still be the principle of all our actions. O happy dependence! God Himself will adore, love and sing through us in an indestructible union in approaching unity!


Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace of a still deeper, though less depressing, sense of my own nothingness.

I. The necessity of actual grace in general.- In the supernatural order man is absolutely helpless. Actual grace is as indispensable to him for the least as well as for the greatest actions. "No man can say 'Jesus' except by the Holy Ghost."

We have often heard this truth expressed, and we have accepted it; the Church has made it an article of faith, and we firmly believe it, but do we realize all it means?

To help us do so, let us take some prominent example, and observe the supernatural life led by a perfect Catholic, a religious or a priest.

He has kept his baptismal innocence, he has served God with unswerving fidelity; he is full of merit, of virtues and of fervor. His merits have procured for him a marvelous increase of sanctifying grace. His nature is perfectly controlled. His fervor brings his love into the fullest activity. Should occasion offer, he is capable of showing great heroism.

Yet even such a man would be unable to pronounce the name of Jesus with faith unless immediate grace came to his aid.

" The most perfectly formed eye," said S. Augustine, "can see nothing without the aid of light."

The most holy man can do no good thing without the divine help of the eternal light of grace.

II. Necessity of predisposing grace.- Let us draw a comparison from the physical order that will help us.

We will suppose a harp absolutely in tune, we may say that it contains an infinite number of latent melodies, yet to produce them there is constant need of the hand of the harpist.

It is inert and silent, but draw the hand across the strings and they vibrate. Look for the origin of a supernatural action, and you will find predisposing grace. It is this grace that has prompted the thought, the desire, this reawakening of activity, and it is this which has aroused the will.

And in this will, by which the action has been decided upon, let us seek again; we shall find it mysteriously informed with actual grace, without robbing human liberty of its prerogatives.

I will, and it is more God than I Who wills through me.

Harp of so great a Master, docile instrument of His beauteous inspirations, left to thyself thou art not more capable than any other harp of giving forth even the most elementary harmony!

Thou art inert; thou wilt remain mute, though thou art the most perfect soul of a saint.

3. The harp- string struck by the artist vibrates. The soul of the just man, set in motion by grace, commences a supernatural action. Neither the sound nor the action can surpass in strength the impulse that has been received. According to the motion will be the effect. The soul, associating itself with the action, neither adds nor subtracts anything, any more than the harp does.

Where is our part? We cooperate, we lend ourselves, we make the impulse received our own: a mere nothing of which God makes something.

III. The need for concomitant grace.- Let us consider one aspect of our incapacity in which it appears more complete than that of the harp. Set in motion, the instrument continues to vibrate for some time. The soul, on the other hand, at once ceases to operate unless the action of grace continues as concomitant grace.

I have commenced a loving deed, for instance; my lips are already forming expressions of affection; but if the action of grace ceases, I may continue the words, but they will be cold and empty.

Then truly I can attribute to myself nothing of my own! Nothing, not even a wish or a simple desire. No, it is contrary to the faith. What! not even the power of meriting this desire, and of obtaining it by the natural efforts of my mind and of my will? No, this claim would be contrary to faith.

But at least leave me some part, however small! Did not S. Paul say, " Yet not I, but the grace of God in me." Then I have my share in this supernatural action. Yes, but so small a share that it cannot beget pride, otherwise the Apostle would not have said: Quis te discernit?-"What distinguishes thee from others?" Yes, it is from God that I have received even what I do of my own free will, and even that by which I have freely done it. Deus est qui operatur in nobis et velle et perficere.

If it is true that I am created being, it is strictly true that my nothingness extends to my activity as well as to depths of my nature.

Reflections and affections.- Astonishment at our sentiments of pride. A clear view of their error and injustice. The grandeur of humility foreshadowed.

Its place.- It is to be found at the basis of every right action and of every virtue. The need of it is not a merely moral need of the utmost importance.

Humility partakes of the same nature as grace, and is just as indispensable.

The whole of this doctrine may be summed up in these significant words: God has the right to exact humility from us, for He has the right to maintain order in His creation. He cannot properly allow us an atom of pride. Let us represent to ourselves this just and Sovereign Lord, His hands full of graces, watching to see where He shall bestow them. He is perfectly free to choose, and He may turn away from me. Let us try to understand the text: Deus superbis resistit!... Humilibus autem dat gratiam-"He resisteth the proud, but giveth grace to the humble."

Before Him let us make ourselves very small, and remain very submissive and dependent. We should love to prostrate ourselves in adoration before Him- it is the attitude that becomes us.

And if, before men, such an attitude is inconvenient, let us keep the sentiment of it in our hearts, a deep sense of our own littleness that will at least serve to make us modest in our deportment.

Resolution.- To contemplate in myself the unceasing action of God. To do nothing without Him- a source of joy as well as of humility. To make myself familiar today with this thought.

Third Meditation
Exercise X
The Necessity of Special Graces

First Point: Their necessity in order to persevere in well-doing.
Second Point: Applications
Third Pint: Humility as the saving virtue.

Evening Preparation.- Tomorrow we are to approach a subject not only based upon sound reason, but of the greatest importance to humility. We shall see that without special graces, to which we have no real claim, we could not resist certain temptations; and that, should we succumb to them, without such graces we could never rise again. Furthermore, simple perseverance in the spiritual life depends absolutely upon their aid.

And it is not only myself, poor, imperfect creature that I am, but the greatest saint among men also lives under this hard condition; like me he, too, must confess his own utter helplessness.

Ah! if only I could realize this as S.Philip Neri did when, each morning, he tremblingly breathed forth this prayer: "O my God! do not trust me. Lay Thy Hand upon my head, for without Thee there is not a fault that I may not be guilty of this day." Now this fear, even in him, was perfectly justified; one act of pride, for instance, depriving him of certain graces, might have led to this fall.

A feeling of fear; a lively sense of my need of God; a desire to sound to its depths this difficult and important truth. These are what are necessary to me.

Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace to feel that profound sense of fear that casts us down at the feet of God broken and submissive.

1. The need of special graces for perseverance in well-doing.- Man is assured of receiving all the graces he needs, but he is not certain of corresponding with them. For this he must have special succor, which none of us can claim as strictly our due. This succor consists in the intensity of grace itself.

Listen to the Council of Trent: "Man in a state of grace cannot persevere in this state except by the special help of God."

Let us weigh each word.

1. It concerns man in the state of grace- that is, man possessing the supernatural life, man having the right to ordinary graces.

It seems that such a man should have all that is necessary to the attainment of his end. Yet, considering his frailty, it is not enough.

2. It concerns every man, though he be a saint. But surely a saint has an indubitable right to these graces! Not at all.

3. It is a question not of perfecting or of improving ourselves in this state, but of persevering in it. But can I not maintain myself where I am, and keep what I have, if I desire with all my heart? No, for without special help even this desire would be lacking.

4. It is a question of real incapability. The holy Council does not say difficulty, or great difficulty; it says impossibility- non posse.

II.Applications.- Let us meditate upon these conclusions:

1. In order to persevere for any considerable time, a special grace is necessary.

2. In order to persevere in face of great danger, an equal grace is required.

3. The brevity of life is often a special gift.

4. The choice of a favorable moment for our death is always so.

O God, I have perhaps before me some years of existence. I shall be lost if I do not obtain special grace from Thee.

O God, some great danger may assail me suddenly when I am unprepared. If Thy special grace does not support me, I shall succumb to it. O God! I may be unfaithful in my later years, in my old age, on the last day of my life; I may sin gravely, and without Thy special grace may be surprised by death.

If, falling into mortal sin, I were to lose my soul's life, in myself I have nothing that would enable me to recover it; I could do nothing to deserve that God would give it back to me; I should not even know how to dispose myself properly to receive it, nor how to pray earnestly enough to obtain it, without a special grace!

Let us try to feel clearly what it is to be thus at the mercy of God, to keep ourselves prostrate before Him in an attitude of total dependence, and to dread as a signal impertinence the attitude of pride.

III.Humility as the saving virtue.- Fearful and depressed, I cast anxious looks around me. My condition appears unendurable. Sin is the cause of it. ... I cannot depend on myself... I can expect nothing from Divine justice. Am i faced with an insoluble problem? No, for the Divine Mercy solves it, stooping to my unworthiness with the tenderness of a mother, and reassuring my fears with unhoped-for promises of pardon, help, grace, and even love. And the engagements made by this Divine Mercy are sacred, and constitute an order of mercy as formal as the order of justice.

We must clearly remember this: that if the regime of justice has its laws, that of mercy has also its laws, which are consequent upon its very nature.

Under the rule of justice, right is the condition; under the rule of mercy, humility is the condition. If I will make myself humble, if I will recollect at all times my own helplessness, if I will keep myself from despising others, and if I continue to pray, I shall fulfill the law, and God, holding to His engagements, will do His part; in spite of my misery, He will love me, He will protect me, He will give me His grace. What I could not claim from His justice I shall infallibly receive from His mercy.

Mercy and humility are correlative terms. Misery abases us as well as humility; but misery is the result of our condition, humility results from our will.

Mercy loves the misery that humbles itself, and rescues it.

I understand now why the Saints attribute the gifts of perseverance to humility.

If I am humble, I remain under the law of universal submission. I dare not make any distinction in God's wishes, and choose to comply only with those which bind under pain of sin. Nor should I murmur in face of difficult duties or sad circumstances, for if I do not strictly owe God certain degrees of submission, neither is He bound to give me certain graces.

The role of prayer is very clearly brought out in this connection. By it I may obtain what I neither have nor deserve. The more I feel the weight of these tremendous truths, the more I shall feel the need of prayer. How heartily I shall repeat the cry of the sacred Liturgy: Deus, in adjutorium meum intende! How I shall tremble when I repeat: Et ne nos inducas in tentationem! How I shall address myself in supplication to those who can intercede for me, to Mary, to the Saints, and to the angels! What a note of faith I shall put into the all-powerful words: "We ask it for the sake of Jesus Christ, our Lord!"

The grace that I implore at this instant, the grace of graces, is that I may become humble. I shall incessantly plead for this, and in order to obtain my petition I will be as lowly as the woman of Canaan. I will be humble, for I wish to be saved.

Resolution.- To see myself at the mercy of God, as I am today and shall be tomorrow, always, even unto death. At the same time to fear any want of confidence in God Who is my Father.


Fourth Meditation
Exercise XI
Our Condition

First Point: The nature of our liberty.
Second Point: Our evil inclinations.
Third Point: The world and the devil.
Fourth Point: Circumstances.

Evening Preparation.- Tomorrow's meditation will develop the preceding one, and in a manner illustrate it. An analysis of our position with regard to good and evil will show us the poverty of our own resources to sustain our virtue, and the power of the enemy that seeks it overthrow.

The sight of our precarious position will prove to us the need of special help, and thus to the impression made by the disturbing meditation of yesterday will be added the force of a reasoned conviction.

I will apply all my attention to this research, which I am undertaking not to establish a truth of faith by reasoning, but to increase my knowledge of it.

O my God, can it be a matter of sorrow to one who loves Thee, to own dependence on Thee for salvation? O my God, to one who trusts Thee can the sense of utter helplessness be distasteful? O my God, if my misery appears to me to be limitless, Thy mercy is infinite, and this mercy is ever within my reach, so long as I retain the conviction of my own weakness, and am ready to cry: "Pity! O my Father!"

Meditation

Prelude.- In order that conviction may follow, to ask for grace to see clearly the circumstances rendering a special intervention of mercy necessary.

I. The nature of our liberty.- Let us first consider the nature of this frail instrument by the aid of which we may make our eternity happy or unhappy- our liberty.

I am conscious of it, with its frequent hesitations and variations; it is disturbed by diverse successive influences, and is profoundly dependent upon the impressions which strike it. Good influences and good motives are needful for its right governance.

Imprudence of choice and a weakness for unwholesome influences will be the means of its undoing. Now I must remember that even after a lifetime of fidelity my liberty remains essentially defectible.

O God, with what joy do I give Thee back my liberty, to subject it to Thy power, to trust it to Thy mercy! Take it, govern it, sustain it, and at need extend to it Thine inexhaustible pardon.

O my God, to address Thee thus is surely to begin to be humble?

II. Our evil inclinations.- Among those fatal influences which lead us to abuse our liberty, our inclinations take the first place. They are inherent in our being. A simple want of balance is their origin. They disguise themselves under countless appearances of good, and if they slumber, they are none the less to be feared, for their awaking may find us self-confident and unarmed. With or without our will they persist in the depths of our nature. Encouraged, they master us; combatted, they remain in a latent influence always secretly at work.

Our inclinations tends towards evil rather than towards good. The Church teaches this, experience proves it, and original sin explains it.

Only the sophists told that man, au fond, is always good. He may vaguely wish to be so, but in practice he confuses what is good with what seems good to him, and it is often the latter that he chooses. There again he allows himself to be deceived by appearances, placing his good solely in enjoyment, wishing to enjoy and enjoy immediately.

This misguided propensity acts upon liberty by illusion and attraction.

We may well be horror-stricken when we look into the depths of ourselves! In order the better to illumine these depths, let us suppose that there is neither hell nor God to love; neither reputation to keep up nor the loss of it ti fear; and let us ask ourselves to what pitch we should then carry our excesses and what our life would be.. It would be exactly what our inclinations would make it, if they were not restrained. Now these inclinations exist, though under control, and they are, alas! ourselves.

If habit is added to this innate power, what a tyranny we fall under! Liberty is then enslaved and disinherited; horror of evil is no longer operative; evil inclinations grow, bearing us away like a torrent; the consciousness of past weakness robs us of all courage; and what grievous and even despotic habits are formed by our countless failings!

In such a pass, who will succor us? God's mercy alone can do so. And what will attract His mercy? Humility. Persons have been known who, in the midst of an evil career, have repented, and, plunging themselves into humility as into a place of refuge, have not been rejected by the Divine Mercy.

III. The world and the devil.- The world that was cursed by the Savior envelops us like an atmosphere, and penetrates us with its poisons as epidemics do with their infection.

Nothing influences a man so much as the conduct of other men. What everyone does, we instinctively suppose may be done; and argument breaks down before this irrational opinion.

The Saints, who are not such free-thinkers as we are, know the devil's power and the extent of his activity. But his influence is most dangerous to those who are unaware of it. We cannot flee the world nor avoid the devil, but we must be on the watch lest we become enervated by the spirit of the one and fall a victim to the cunning of the other.

The devil is ever ready to take advantage of a favorable opportunity ; and our inclinations are only too apt to become his accomplices in his efforts to ensnare our thoughtless liberty.

What will become of us if our pride, alienating us from the Heart of God, leaves us at the mercy of such enemies?

IV. Circumstances.- In circumstances such as we have described, free though we are we shall most certainly succumb.

God knows them all, even the most trying. He measures the degree of resistance we can offer, and He knows that in certain cases this degree, sufficient in itself, will be rendered totally inadequate by our own weakness.

In such cases will He leave us to ourselves or will He deliver us? once we are engaged in battle, will He come to our aid, or will He permit us to fall? God alone knows. If He removes the danger or strengthens our resistance, it is a grace which is not our due. How complete then is our dependence!

O my God, Thou knowest the concourse of events; Thou forseest those days of idle enervation , when the soul abates her watchfulness and the energy of the will is relaxed. Before Thou dost determine to grant the special help Thou designest, Thou dost survey the dispositions of the soul that is in danger. If Thou seest her humble and submissive, Thou stretchest forth Thy hand and she is saved. If Thou seest her hardened in pride, Thou dost turn away Thy face, and she is lost.

O God, O Father, I have no distrust of Thee! I only fear myself, and I shall not fear myself if I hide myself in the bosom of Thy mercy. I do indeed desire to enter there and never go out again. I will study lovingly Thy beneficent laws; I will learn to be gentle and indulgent to others as Thou art towards me; to expect no esteem for any excellence in myself, for Thou alone art the Author of it, and it is none of mine.

All the pains of my poor life, every slight, every neglect, every disappointment, and even the deepest humiliation, I will accept, my God and Father, as the united action of Thy justice and Thy mercy, as the providential means of my present rehabilitation and of my future glory.

O my God, hast Thou not given me Thy Son, Jesus? With Him I am sure of Thee. Living in Him I am sure of myself. O Jesus, visit my nothingness, inform and animate it. Let me live in Thee, love in Thee, and with Thee go forward.

O God, O Father, Thou givest me an overwhelming sense of my helplessness only to draw me to Thine Arms! What happiness to rest there forever! I depend on Thee and press myself ever more closely to Thine adorable Bosom!

Resolution.- To take pity on my own vain self-confidence, supplicating God to heal my blindness.


Remarks on the Two Preceding Meditations

The study of any kind of life, whether it be the life of the soul, the life of the body, or even the humble life of the plant, fills us with astonishment not unmixed with fear. Everything appears so delicate, so complex, so fragile, that every moment we expect to see the organism destroyed by the slightest accident. The perusal of medical books has this effect.

Happily, experience reassures us. Our being appears too frail to exist, yet it does exist; too weak to resist so many destructive agencies, yet it endures. Thus it is in the supernatural order. Its life seems to be perpetually threatened, yet our knowledge of he facts allays our fears. There is ever in play, as a constant remedy, that marvelous power that we call Providence, but which here may receive the better name of Mercy.

1.As a matter of fact, there is no Christian who has not largely in his power to avoid every mortal sin, and to lift himself up again if he sins.

2.There is not a soul who cannot obtain by prayer all that he needs; and not one who, for a single moment, is deprived of the power to pray.

3.What we cannot, perhaps, do today we shall be able to do tomorrow, if we use well every little grace we have. (Gratiae remote sufficientes.)

4.Certain aids which are not strictly our due, will infallibly be given to us; and it is of no consequence to us that they are not ours by right if they are granted to us by favor.

5.At the day of judgment, each soul will be compelled by the evidence to admit that God has been good, and very good, to her; there will have been no exception to this rule, for we are under the dispensation of mercy. Therefore, let us not forget that we are also under the obligation of humility.


Fifth Meditation
Exercise XII
Our Faults

First Point: An examination of their cause.
Second Point: The judgment assigned to them.

Evening Preparation.- Here we set foot on our own territory, for nothing is so much our own as sin. It is ours and ours alone, the only thing in which God is not.

Let us step into this dreary land with courage, and set ourselves to explore it thoroughly.

Too often we have run our eyes absently over it, as if it were a familiar road where nothing can surprise us.

We must learn to see ourselves clearly and to judge ourselves fairly if we are to arrive at our true worth. Do not let us permit ourselves to pass over our humiliating discoveries with this thought: I am not the only one!

Though others may be sinners, are we less guilty? A prison may be full of criminals, but each individual must bear his own disgrace. Man is confronted with God alone. Tibi soli peccavi.

Were he only face to face with himself, with his conscience, his dignity, his ideal, these three great things would accuse without any regard to like faults committed by other men.

And besides, what is our rank among sinners? We shall never know until the last day. It is neither the number nor the apparent gravity of faults that determines the degree of guilt. Farther on we shall see what is the attitude that humility imposes upon us with regard to others; here we are chiefly concerned to ascertain the judgment we ought to pass upon ourselves and upon our work; and if we arrive at a reasonable persuasion of our small personal worth, if we feel abased before God and before our conscience, we shall find it very easy to deny ourselves all contempt for others, all arrogance, and all susceptibility.

We shall have, besides, sufficient logic not to aspire to a particular esteem that we know we do not deserve.

O my God, help me to know myself truly. Disperse the illusions which obscure from me the gravity of my misdeeds, and keep me from exaggerations which will hinder me from arriving at the truth. I wish to judge myself as Thou Thyself judgest me.

I will not set out with the preconceived idea that in order to be humble, it is necessary to believe oneself ill and miserable; I will study the matter coldly, with the freedom of an independent mind, and with the minute care of one who is bent solely on the quest for truth, and on arriving at just conclusions.

Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace of clear illumination on mt life, and my great loyalty in judging it.

I. The examination of causes.-1.Deeds.- This is a kind of general confession, renewed before God alone. It is a secret and sorrowful review of the actions of our arbitrary liberty.

It is a good plan to divide the life into successive periods, and to pause upon the dominating feature of each.

It should be possible to arrive at an approximate number of faults, at least of grave faults.

We will fix our attention to the most humiliating faults, if our imagination is not likely to suffer from it.

2. Motives.- The true ones, those we do no avow. The motives of faults are always bad; some are worse than others, some are abominable. In the main, it is for self-gratification that we have sinned.

Even in our good actions we shall find corrupt motives. Sometimes we shall find that they have been inspired by the craving to appear better than we are.

3. Graces.- Side by side with the story of ingratitude runs the story of mercy: the privilege of a religious education, favorable environment, graces of piety,even of fervor, graces of preservation. What should we have been without them? Repentance long awaited and almost miraculously granted. Let us count the number of our absolution... and of our fresh falls.... If we had not counted upon this ready pardon, perhaps we should have sinned less.

We should feel astonishment that God's Providence should have been so good and so persevering, and a still greater astonishment at our ingratitude and persistent estrangement,...and we were not even happy!

Our attitude today is not exactly that of repentance, but it is that of humility. Peccatum meum contra me est semper. Faults may be effaced, and perhaps their effects; but deeds never.

II. The judgment assigned.- 1.From the point of view of our personal worth, what trust do we deserve?

Trust can be placed only in uprightness of character and firmness of soul.

Now, to be continually alternating from faults to repentance, and from repentance to fresh faults, is not to govern our lives.

To succumb to the least temptation, sometimes without resistance, just because, after a short time, tiresome habits return, is not to be masters of ourselves.

We have willed to do better, and so we fancy we have changed, and then we have fallen again. What does our will count for? We say to ourselves again and again: "How foolish I am!" and yet reason, that sees so clearly, has no power to control us.

Sometimes the lower instincts gain such an ascendancy over reason itself that they furnish it with false justifications.

Truly evil has too often been my master, and I have no right to self-confidence.

2. From the point of view of personal dignity, have we any claim to honor?

Honor is allied to dignity. Now dignity demands that we hold to our rank without derogating from it, and that we unfalteringly adhere to our word.

How many times and to what extent have I not disgraced my Christian dignity, and perhaps even my dignity as a man?

I have allowed derogatory principles to enter my soul and to affect the dispositions of my body.

Have not caprice, passion, egotism, and pride too often replaced as motives the noble love of goodness?

And still I would fain believe myself worthy of honor!

Is he worthy of honor who is a breaker of his word?

I have given pledges in full cognisance of their meaning, pledges of conscience, to my confessor, to my God. The breaking of a single pledge would dishonor a man of the world, and I cannot count the number of my defections.

In truth, have I not lost all personal dignity? and to what honor can I aspire?

3. From the point of view of my ideal, how do I stand?

My ideal was my possible history, written by the goodness of God; it was the series of gifts which were to have been offered to me if I were faithful. It was the perpetual growth of my personality, and my destiny that should have grown ever more and more beautiful with time.

What an ideal!- and to what a condition has it given place! graces rendered fruitless, effort refused, diminution everywhere. After each absolution, the plan restored, though on a smaller scale, but again disfigured by failure.

I see God working incessantly to remake it, and myself working no less industriously to unmake it.

The ideal realized would have meant the embellishment and elevation of my whole being. What have I made of it? And what am I? Ugliness and baseness- what a contrast!

Gradually the action of God in me has decreased in power; His image has faded; His joy has gone out!

Ah! I have no refuge but in confusion, confession, and repentance. I have no refuge except in the sincerest humility!

O magnanimous God, Thou wilt not strike him who humbles himself even to the dust. O God of pity, pity the beggar who has naught but the rags of his poverty to show Thee.

In this poor man, O heavenly Father, behold the features, the disfigured features, of Jesus, Thy well beloved Son! Thou wilt not ignore His likeness in me. Have compassion on His glory. His glory? Oh! how pure and great will it be if from a miserable being Thou wilt make a new creature, good and beautiful, strong and tender, confident and generous, and above all humble.

Put far from me in the future all my faults, I desire never to commit another; but if it must be so, leave me above all a lively sense of my own unworthiness, that it may accompany me in my progress and in the success of my zeal, stimulating continually my gratitude, my desire for reparation, and in a profound humility that sacred love which is Thy life and mine, the divine fruit of Thy mercy and delight of my repentance!

Resolution.- To feel confusion of an unhappy being appearing before a tribunal, and who has there to face grievous accusations. To keep this impression throughout the day.

Sixth Meditation
Exercise XIII
Prayer Edited by Pope Urban VIII
(Placed at the beginning of the Roman Breviary)

Evening Preparation.- In this meditation we shall seek to establish ourselves in humility, rather by the sincere and ardent expression of our feelings than by the aid of reasoning.

In acquiring a virtue, to be convinced of our need of it is of the first importance; but sentiment is, perhaps a more powerful lever. It stirs the whole soul, and even deepens our consciousness of our need. Conviction belongs to the intelligence, but the expression of a sentiment is an act of the will, and it is in the will that virtue is formed and perfected.

We shall have but one aim tomorrow: to plunge ourselves into humiliation. With heartfelt words of a saint, we will deplore our ingratitude, our ever-recurring egotism, our countless failures; and also, with a great access of confidence, we will throw ourselves unreservedly upon God's mercy, surrendering ourselves to Jesus our Savior.

O my God grant me tomorrow a warmer heart, a softened heart, a heart at least striving to feel. I do not ask Thee for tears, but for real sorrow. O my God, bestow upon my soul that inclination towards humility that alone can make me humble, but grant me also that confidence which alone can make me valiant.

I am full of faults and wretchedness of myself, but by Thy grace I may obtain the riches and beauty of Jesus. O, Life of Jesus, like a divine seed, deign to thrust Thy roots into the soil of our wretchedness; one day Thou shalt blossom in heaven.

Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace of a sincere repentance. Ante oculos tuos, Domine, culpas nostras ferimus. Weighed down and depressed, we place before Thine eyes, O just God our Father, the heavy burden of our faults! Et plagas quas accepimus conferimus- "And we show Thee the wounds made by our sins." They disfigure us, they make us suffer, they keep us in a state of pitiable weakness, for they are many, deep and badly dressed.

Si pensamus malum quod fecimus, minus est quod patimur, majus est quod meremur. My head bowed down, my lips that kiss Thy feet, my tears that bathe them, the pity I implore, all cry to Thee that I recognize my faults, and that I accept the punishment. The trials of my present life, those that the future holds, all together are nothing compared with my deserts. Gravius est quod commisimus, levius est quod toleramus.

Peccandi poenam sentimus te peccandi pertinaciam non vitamus. Inconceivable cowardice! Under the sting of punishment I burn with indignation against myself, but under renewed temptation I find myself as feeble as before.

Despite the graces that I have received, the resolutions I have made, the many chastisements I have suffered; despite my penitence and my regret, despite my oft-renewed aspirations, evil still has the power to conquer me, to lift its head again when trials pass!

In flagellis nostris infirmitas nostra teritur et iniquitas non mutatur- Thou breakest us and we are not changed; we are bruised and persist in wrong-doing! Mens aegra torquetor et cervix non flectitur- Sad, sick, tortured, still we will not bend.

Vita in dolore suspirat, et opere non se emendat- Our life is wasted in sorrow and lamentation and we find no way of return!

O human heart, O heart of mine, how feeble thou art, and easily led astray! How inconstant and changeable! Thou dost suffer from evil-doing, and thou willest to suffer still more; thou knowest thyself sick, and thou dost not sincerely seek a cure!

Thou groanest in thy fetters yet thou dost cling to them!

Si expectas, non corrigimur. O Lord, Thy patience is long-suffering, and by my fault it is useless! Thou dost wait and we do not correct ourselves.

Si vindicas, non duramus- If thou becomest a God of vengeance, we cannot endure it.

Confitemur in correctione quod egimus, obliviscimur post visitationem quod flevimus- Thou comest to chastise us, and we confess our faults; Thou withdrawest Thyself, and presently we forget what we have bewailed!

Si extendas manum, facienda promittimus: si suspenderis gladium, promisa non solvimus- Thou extendset Thy hand, and we promise everything; Thou withdrawest the sword, and we are forsworn.

Si ferias, clamamus ut parcas, si peperceris, peccamus ut ferias- Tho strikest and we cry for pardon, and again we provoke Thy blows!

Habes, Domine, confitentes reos! novimus quod nisi dimittas, recte non perimus. Ah! at least, Lord, I do not excuse myself; I am guilty and I freely confess it. This avowal solaces me; it is the unloading of my conscience, in view of my endless falls and incessant provocations! If Thou dost not take pity on me I am lost, and justly so!

Praesta, Pater omnipotens, sine merito quod rogamus, qui fecisti ex nihilo, qui te rogarent per Christum, Dominum nostram. O Almighty Father, this being whom Thou hast created from nothing beseeches Thee! He is without merit, but since Thou hast bestowed the grace of prayer, use Thy right to pardon. Thou puttest in my mouth the accents that will touch Thee; Thou armest my prayer with a name that compels Thee; Thou seest in me Him Whom Thou lovest, Jesus, by Whom I pray.

In this long litany of our miseries, let us study the action of humility.

It is humility that speaks, that groans, that touches. It is humility that gives to God His rightful place, and to us the attitude that befits us.

It is to the tears of humility that mercy stoops, and it is on her head that pardon descends.

It is humility that causes Jesus to put Himself in the place of our sorry personality.

Should pride wish to raise its head, what confusion and what punishment! Pride could never soften the heart of God, nor our own!

"Our misery is the throne of the mercy of God," said S.Francis de Sales.

The road from the Heart of God to ours, and of ours to His, is humility.

As soon as they are touched by the reflection of this virtue, our miseries take on a hue of supernatural beauty. As soon as they are touched by mercy, they are transformed in love.

Resolution.- To entertain a profound and sweet sense of the goodness of God. "I will sing of Thy mercies forever."


Seventh Meditation-(1)
Exercise XIV-(1)
In the Presence of the Saints

Note.- If thirty days only are given to these exercises, the two following meditations may be taken together. Though traversing different roads, they meet at the same point: the lively sense of our humiliating mediocrity.

Evening Preparation.- What effect should I look for from a contemplation of the virtues of the Saints? A keen sense of my littleness, and also a stimulus to my laxity, for a humility that destroys false pretensions excites true courage.

In the presence of the virtue of the Saints we are overpowered by a sense of greatness, such as we experience at the foot of a high mountain or in sight of the ocean. But we must not be satisfied with this general impression, we must pass on to an examination of the details of their superiority, their virtues, their sentiments, their works,...and at the same time consider our virtues, our sentiments, our works!

In an uneducated society the man who can read prides himself on his accomplishment. Do you admire him? No; then beware of a vain esteem which sets you above your fellows.

But must we compare ourselves with the Saints, whose lives were exceptional, if we are to form a just appreciation of our worth? Yes, since we pretend to a special esteem. In fact, the measure of a desert is found in what is exalted and not in what is mediocre.

For what matter for pride is there in being a little less debased than some poor wretch?

In the presence of all superiority, one of the two feelings may be aroused: that of despair, which, feeling itself unable to reach such a height, gives up the attempt; or that of courage, true greatness of soul, which repeats with S.Augustine, " Can I not do what others have done?" Tears of holy emulation fill the eyes, an almost violent emotion swells the breast, and, with eyes directed to heaven, we cry: "I can do all in Him Who strengthens me!"

The proud man reflects upon his own insufficiency, and sinks down; the humble considers the Divine strength and casts himself upon it. Oh! Thou Who makest Saints, commence to fashion me to humility. I shall be in Thy hands like common but malleable clay, lending itself to receive the likeness of Thine image.

Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace of such a vision of the moral beauty of the Saints, that I shall feel nothing but a profound self-contempt.

The Apostles.- S.Peter, S.Andrew, S.Paul. They belong no more to themselves, the Spirit of God possesses and governs them; their zeal extends over the whole world and stoops the lowest slave.

Weariness, persecution, the sword only stimulate them; scourgings rejoice them; miracles accompany them. Towns, peoples, fall at their feet. They die and are buried in obscurity, the time and place of their martyrdom often remaining unknown.

And what of my zeal? my courage? my abnegation? my divine conquests? my personal gifts? I regard them with pity! and the thought of my pride covers me with confusion! Yet I accept praise, and I am complacent about the little things I do.

What a humiliation, to set myself beside an Apostle and to measure myself by him!

The Virgin Martyrs.- S.Lucy, S.Agnes, S.Agatha. They loved Jesus only, and they loved Him with holy passion. Their souls are a heaven in which a pure and gentle light is diffused. Not a shadow of an unworthy thought. Love has gone on growing until it has left no room for dreams of sense. Never would they belong to a mortal being. Smiling, they bow the head to the executioner; to die is to be with Jesus. O quam pulchra est casta generatio cum claritate!- "How beautiful is this noble race in its dazzling purity!"

Let us set our own souls and our own lives beside this whiteness, this peace, this gentle love: imaginations, dreams, torments, struggles,... all the past that I have forgotten but which God remembers.

Ah! how can we be proud of our virtue, preserved perhaps, perhaps restored, but always so imperfect!

The Hermit Saints.- S.Anthony, S.Pacomius, S.Hilary. Let us follow them into the desert.

Silence and forgetfulness envelop them! The eye of God is the only star that lights their way; their prayer is almost continuous, and sleep and food are curtailed to a degree only just sufficient to preserve life. They undertake terrible mortification each day, each night, their whole life through.

Let me see myself beside them, enjoying every comfort of life! Perhaps my health demands it. But it would be absurd for anyone to think I am mortified or to suppose it myself. Ah! how easy it should be for me to be humble and lowly!

The Doctors of the Church.- S.Ambrose, S.Augustine, S.Chrysostom, S.Thomas. Their knowledge is so wide that even we of the present day are confounded by it. The influence they exercised in their own period, and that they will continue to exercise until the end of time, testifies to their high worth.

And yet I am conceited about my little knowledge- shallow and of small worth, very limited, and just what is to be found in countless books.

I should rejoice immoderately to see that my influence was felt a hundred paces off!

The Contemplatives.- These form the supreme hierarchy of souls: S.Francis of Assisi, S.Catherine, S.Theresa. What ascents! what heights! what visions! what flights!- and in their service of God, what love! what union! Purity, brilliant lucidity, in all their intellectual faculties; fiery affections; supreme detachment; marvelous celestial favors; souls in a sense melted and liquefied, molding themselves marvelously to the fashion of the heart of God!

On my knees, my eyes raised to heaven, I watch the unfolding of this vision, and in its light I behold myself dull and coarse. Can I be of the same nature as these wondrous beings? What kind of prayers are mine, and what is their result? What is my attention to God? Is my love ever growing purer, higher, more intimate, warmer, brighter?

The Unknown Souls.- They have passed their lives in work, in prayer, in suffering. They did good so quietly that it was never noised abroad. God alone knows what graces have been bestowed at their intercession. Others have reaped the harvest that they have sown.

What heroism has been shown by poor women struggling with the harshness of existence!

They looked calm and were supposed to be happy- and so they were indeed, but in another way. We have perhaps known such; have we appreciated them?

Resolution.- To keep in mind one of these great groups of holy souls, and to think of them many times during the day.


Seventh Meditation-(2)
Exercise XIV-(2)
In the Presence of God

Evening Preparation.- Our aim in this meditation is to extinguish the vain lights of self-esteem by a contemplation of the beauty of the Infinite. We must try to reserve some long time for this meditation, and to keep ourselves in great interior peace. We need long and close attention if we are to understand anything of the mysterious splendor of the Supreme Being.

We must be wholly detached in our interior as well as our exterior senses, that we may be open to those sights that are beyond sense.

Consider one by one the Divine perfections, and set beside them your own poverty and ugliness.

This comparison is easy, suggestive, and convicting, and it will fill you with sentiments of confusion that will influence your practical life.

To feel oneself abased and annihilated before God is to dispose oneself not to value self before others.

This evening, notice that what are the most unworthy tendencies and the most humiliating faults of your life, and propose to yourself to contrast them with the Divine perfections in such a manner as will best show up their ugliness: inalienable purity opposed to our stains, serene immutability opposed to our inconstancy, sovereign peace to our agitations and troubles, etc.

Meditation

Prelude.- To ask the grace to feel such a sense of the Divine grandeur as will absorb all feeling of vain personal esteem.

From the contemplation of the Saints let us ascend to the contemplation of God. Before the perfection of God the sanctity of man appears as a drop of water compared with the majestic ocean, or a tiny night-light with the brightness of the sun.

To the greater number of souls, the mysterious abysses of the Divine attributes, where thought loses itself in ravishment, are a sealed book. The heart needs great purity to plunge into their depths, and the intellect entire attention to understand their silences.

We will not here attempt to trace the route to those abysses, and those who have found the way of light will need no aid. But we may be allowed to contrast our littleness with such majesty, as a painter places a man at the foot of a great monument in order to give a true idea of its size.

O God, Thou art all-powerful, and I am infinitely weak!

Thou art immensity, and I occupy an imperceptible point in space!

Thou art wisdom, peace, harmony, measure; and I am error, improvidence, haste, trouble, disorder!

Thou art sanctity, pure, exalted, complete, the imperious enemy of all evil; while I am defect, lust, sin!

Thou art immutability; what Thou art, Thou remainest always; what Thou thinkest, what Thou willest, Thou thinkest, Thou willest eternally. While I am nothing but inconsistency and instability.

My impressions and my tastes change like a passing cloud!

Thou art beauty, without flaw, without shadow, without decline; everything which on earth delights, enchants, and beguiles us from ourselves, is but a dim reflection of Thy ravishing beauty!

The vault of heaven of of azure blue, with its pensive stars; soft winds of spring, drunk with the perfume of a thousand flowers; noble voices of the forests and the waters; streams of light filling every place with brightness; the whole concert of nature- what are you? A little movement, an appearance, a nothing.

Soul of man, genius of man, what are you? A higher reflection of the eternal Intelligence, but only a reflection: heart of man, source of all our feelings, spring of our generosities, greater, higher than all in thy love, thou art but a spark in comparison with the infinite Love!

This comparison of the perfections of God with our unspeakable miseries provokes two kinds of reflections and sentiments:

1. What am I beside Him? What absurdity to compare myself with Him! How empty is pride!

2. What does it mean to offend God? It is to attack all His perfections, and they rise against us and condemn us, for of what an injury, a profanation and folly are we guilty!

How sweet and gentle will that humility be that is the outcome of these two considerations- the consideration of God, and the consideration of myself.

A glance towards God fills me with confidence and ravishment! A glance at myself must make me sad, but grateful and above all humble. How well might we cry with S.Francis all through the night: "My God and my all! My God and my all!"- the expression of a humility full of love and of adoration.

Resolution.- To be ashamed of my rags, but still more ashamed of my pride, and to feel a holy emulation, for is not God given to me to be my model? What is wanting to the Almighty to make me a saint? Great humility on my part.